I need help about an autobiography incident essay based on the 1st day of high school?
Question by Katastrophic™!: I need help about an autobiography incident essay based on the 1st day of high school?
Okay, so I decided to write my story about my first day of high school (freshman).
because I couldn't think of anything else better to write about.
And my paper guideline says that I need to explain how this personal incident changed me in some way over the course of my young life.
Well, how do I write the story ?
Here's what I have so far:
This is a story about how my life got flipped, turned upside-down. And I'd like to take a minute, just sit right there, I'd like to tell you about my first day of school. It was a bright sunny day, the sky was as blue as the ocean, there were clouds soft as a marshmallow and there was a slight breeze in the air. “Beep beep beep!” the sound of my alarm clock woke me up. I had set it the night before to make sure that I wouldn’t oversleep. Boy was I excited! This was the first day of school, and I couldn’t wait to go back! I was anxious to see my old friends and to show off my new school clothes. “Rise and shine!" my mom stepped into my room and opened up the curtains. "Five more minutes please mom?" I groaned and said tiredly... "Today is your first day of high school honey, you don't want to be late do you?" she said with a gentle voice. "Okay" I said. I jumped out of my bed and headed to the bathroom to take a shower. I put on my new pair of Vans, which I worked the whole summer to get, putted on a pair of skinny jeans and a t-shirt. Then, I brushed my teeth, combed my hair, and put on my jewelry. I gathered all of my school supplies-binder, paper, pencils, pens, single subject notebooks-and put them in my book bag. "Bye dear don't forget your lunch money" "Thanks mom"
As I made my way to the bus stop, I began to feel nervous and I started feel something strange in my stomach. I read in a book that if you feel nervous, you should inhale and exhale as many times as you can to get rid of the nerves. So I did but somehow the nerves wouldn't go away. As the bus arrived, I took a step back and hesitated. I heard a familiar voice coming from inside the bus. “Hey!” It was my friend John. We've been friends since the fourth grade. I stepped inside the bus and sat next him. From there we started talking about our summer and how we are excited about our first day of high school. The bus slowly drove by the school, "Here we are kids, good luck on your first day kiddos" the bus driver said. I took a deep breath and started walking to the main entrance. "What's wrong with you" John questioned? "Oh nothing", It’s just that I’m a bit nervous. “Awe don't be, as long as we're together we can do anything.” He said in a positive gesture. As we pass through the main entrance, I slowly took baby steps forward and I looked around at all the kids. Most of them were in groups talking and laughing while others were smiling. I felt like I was another creature almost like an alien from another planet and decide to land on Earth just for the heck of it. I thought to myself, I can do this, there's nothing to be nervous about. I took another baby step forward and as I did, I started to feel that same strange reaction in stomach.
I took out the white piece of paper with bunch of numbers, teachers’ names and courses. I tried to look around for my classes, but I noticed I was on the wrong side of the building! At least I'm not the only kid who seems to be lost. I found John standing at the main entrance staring aimlessly at his schedule. "John, are you lost?" I said. “I guess, I don't know where to go”, he said with a confused look on his face. “Hey look there's a teacher why don't we ask her for help!" "Good idea" "Umm, excuse me miss? Excuse me?” She didn't stop once or even look at us. "That was very insincere of her" we both said. "Now what”, I said with a nervous look on my face. “I don’t know, I guess we're on our own now”, he said. We picked our back packs and walked aimlessly and tried to fit in. We walked and walked to find our classes but we couldn't but instead we ended up at main entrance. “Ughh”, John said, “This is stupid we're never going to find our classes if we keep this up!” I felt worried and fear began to crawl up. I wanted to go back home with my mom, I know for sure I’ll be a whole lot safer at home than here... But I'm here now and the bus doesn't come until another 6 hours.
We saw a student walked by pass us, "Hey you!" I yelled. Could you help us? We're a little lost here. "Sure, I’m glad to help you guys" he said positively. First, I’ll need to see your schedule and I’ll show you where to go." We showed him our schedule and he gave us directions and which buildings to go. We we’re very thankful that he showed us where our class was. From here John and I had to separate. He had one class on the other end of the building and vice-versa.
I went to my first class, I felt so nervous, my legs and my arms were shaking like as if an earthquake began to shake the ground. I couldn't stop them from shaking. As I walked in my first period class, everyone’s
(continued..)
eyes were staring at me, I began to sweat I felt like I was on stage and everyone was expected to see something. I thought someone would come up and say a warm "Welcome" or a simple "Hello" to me. But no one has taken that time. I just stood there at the back of the room and stared at all the students. I know they all judge me as I also judged them. The bell rang and it was time for second period... My stomach felt like as if there were butterflies in them.
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My question was: how should I continue to write the story? Remember, I need to write about something that has changed me in some way over the course of my young life. I don't know how to tell how it changed me.
Best answer:
Answer by miss michelle
beings how your not in 6th grade, id definitely loose the lyrics to The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air at the beginning. hahhaha. and instead of always saying "john said" or "she said" alternate between saying "john stated" "john muttered" "john mentioned" or other creative ways of telling who says what. a teacher told me that once and it really does make all the difference when reading something. other then that and some grammatical errors, i think its pretty good [: love your descriptive details, imagery is everything.
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